Dell complaints

[VOC_Champion]

Hello all,

I've had a the joy of working at Dell for 9 months now. At first I was thinking it was OK. But now when i look at the new management coming in i have to wonder. It seems they are picking people solely on the basis that they are brain-dead morons who do nothing but sing from the company hyme book.

I was already an experienced technician when i joined dell, I find myself in an environment where technical knowledge is not rewarded, or even encouraged. We are all forced to use DSN (the Monkey tool) even although we do not need to. It contains various pointless steps, such as for example, updating firmware on an optical drive because it doesn't eject. Do Dell really supply optical drives with firmware that does not allow the drive to eject? No? So why update it?

All the little things that used to brush over now seem to weigh heavy on my mind. We are now being measured on talk and weight. We have to have 4 hours 30 minutes t&w each day or else we can be put on a "PIP". This basically means that instead of solving the customer’s issue, then letting them off the phone before they get pissed off, we have to keep them on, waiting while looking for parts on the piece of shit that is SPMD and dellseve. In my personal opinion, if i am taking calls and solving the issue while keeping the customer happy (by letting them off the phone quicker) what is the problem?

VOC is another area which i find really dumb. The surveys are sent out randomly to any person who dealt with a particular case. In REL client support this DOES NOT WORK, anyone can deal with a customer, there is no ownership of the customer until they require escalation. Because of this the survey is sent randomly. The customer does not even know who he is filling out a survey for.

If you haven't already guessed, i want to leave dell now. I have had enough of this corporate ass-licking crap. I resent being told that I'm not "winning with integrity" and i need to "get a winning attitude". What the hell does that mean anyway?

Stupid corporate twats.

Anyway, rant over. hello people.

[NoRulez]

VOC surveys are the only way for Dell to measure our performance/competence/human relations skills, but it is up to you to coach the client as to what the survey is all about, should they receive a VOC call. Important fact is that they must know that the survey only covers the job thay you have just done and not any other or previous issues. That will give a true reflection on you as a person.
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You are what you believe! Be the Reason! Take pride in what you do!

[Master chief]

Selling the survey would you listen to yourself (NoRulez) your spouting verbal shit. You sound like a brain washed fool. I feel sorry for people like you. What dell needs is an enema, to flush out all the corporate climbers.

All that Dell verbal bull shit "be the reason", no person in their right mind believes a word of it.

[FallenAngel]

[NoRulez]

[PhoneMonkey]

Got to agree with you there, osme of Dells work practices make me thing, as Scott Adams puts it, that the place is being run by a bunch of drunken lemurs.

What the hell is this 65% TOL bullcrap anyway? If I'm not on the phone for 65% of my working day then I'm not being working.

Yes because I don't have to worry about calling customers back to follow up on troubleshooting, research wierd problems, spend ages trying to find a PSU for an Opitplex 755, deal with Holds & Cancels because I've got the dispatcher who wants me to check the IO Panel for every single type of fault (Noisy fan in a GX280? Have you checked the IO Panel for damage?)
Trying to find any TL who isn't in a meeting (I think those guys have meetings to discuss what they are going to bring up in the next meeting). Being put on Hold while transferring a call to Customer Don't Care (yes, being on Hold doesn't count towards TOL).

At the moment I'm told I'm being less productive than a tech who just started because he takes 4 calls a day and spends about an hour on each call while I amaveraging 21 calls a day.

And don't get me started on bloody VOC and all the bullshit we are being forced to spew onto the unwary customer.

It's very bloody awkward trying to spew the amazing amount of useless platitudes we have to make the cusotmers suffer just to get them off the phone.
"Yes you're call is all booked up now, the engineer, courier will call tomorrow between 9am and 5.30pm including lunch times. Are there any other issues I can help you with? Are you happy with the service you have recieved from Dell today? Here is your case number. If you wish to contact me regarding this case please call this number and then enter this extension number. Thank you for calling Dell"

I'm usually about a quarter of the way through this spiel befoere they hang up on me.

And to top it all, I got my first negative survey of the quarter today when a woman gave me a 1 because sales wouldn't call her back to give her a quote on memory for her sons Dell. She rang me to get a replacement for her works keyboard, which she got booked up and sent out in under 5 minutes. But I am still getting hit with the negative becuase "You didn't ask her if she had any other issues with Dell."

Dell need to wake up and realise that most people in this country don;t want the condescending "Are you happy with the service bullshit" They want their problem fixed and they want it fixed now.

[keptman]

research? research what? and like you really call the customer back once you done your 'research'? all that means is you have to take a shit and the customer is getting too long winded and you're leaving skid marks in your underware unless you freeball then you're leaving the skids on your chair.
we've all done the i'll have to research that and get back to you shit. why not have some balls and just tell the customer hey, look, i don't have that answer but if you hang on here with me, we'll look at it together. solve the issue so they don't call back and cuss you to the next rep because your shit turned into a really big shit and you ran out of toilet paper and had to ask the dude next to you who thought you were using too wide a stance and wanted a blow job.
auto-in is your friend.
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former dell scapegoat

[PhoneMonkey]

yeah, I'm really gonna keep the guy hanging on the line while I go downstairs to the lab and try to replicate whatever funky problem he has on one of the aging machines in the lab.

Unlike you I like to take some pride in my work and actually do my job and help people which is getting more and more difficult with the 'policy' changes the drunken lemurs come up with. Liek the new one of not making any outbound calls without booking the tim ein advance on some crappy web application.

[The Professional]

PhoneMonkey, sounds like you are in business support?

I'm an XPS tech now, but when I started at Dell in 2006, it was in ACS. They where just implementing their 'pure support' or 'gloves off' pilot here in Ottawa.

For that one year, it was a great job. Our only mandate was to resolve the issue, no matter what it took. We where not forced to use DSN, we where not bothered by management over talk times, we could do our own outbound calls whenever needed, and the customer could call our phone extension or email us. We got off-cue time to work on projects and do some real training.

The only metrics that mattered where MPR, RR and RDR. We all got great at finding a resolution quickly, getting the customer off the phone, and taking the next call. 20 calls a day where normal for us, and we where rewarded for taking a lot of calls, no accused of being unproductive. Most of management where all good people, and there was actually some meritocracy. That's why Ottawa was the best.

It all started to go downhill a bit, when the Quality Department got involved. They started telling us all the BS the customer allegedly 'wants' to hear at the beginning or end of a call. The score on quality audits started reflecting how much fluff you added into the call. It was not uncommon for a lot of the top techs to have poor QA scores, because all we where interested in was gettng the job done for the customer.

The XPS merger did away with all the good stuff. It probably killed the Ottawa site. Working in XPS is like a sweatshop. Can't wait for it all to be over

[keptman]

you suck as a tech there phonechimp. how in the world are you going to replicate what they user did at home? unless you have installed what they did, you almost certainly can't replicate their screw up. which is why you should use, um, what's it called? um, it's something, it's on the tip of my tongue...oh yeah, the internet and look up forums that other people have left comments about the same error. you know what? you may even find the solution there. i used that modern marvle the internet there to find a forum to solve an oil leak on my truck. so if something is out there about my very same issue on the truck, there MUST be something out there regarding their issues too. i mean, they can't be the only one out there with that type of problem unless they wrote a program that only they have and it's causing problems. you're lazy. face it, you don't want to look up the problem. you'd rather ditch the customer by telling them you need to research something. research it with them on the phone with you. tell them where you are looking. and when you get the answer, tell them where you found it. that chimpboy is true customer service. sounds like you are in the wrong field. male monkeys are good at masturbating, so maybe you should try to find someone who will pay you to do that to yourself rather than to the customer calling in with problems?
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former dell scapegoat

[PhoneMonkey]

[PhoneMonkey]

[keptman]

chimp, you're not getting it. perhaps you're set up differently over the pond, but you don't simply blow off a customer to say "i'm going to research it". resolve the issue. but what really blows my mind, you said it yourself, you knew it to be a flaw. so...why no resolution? perhaps you've never heard of "don's tips" or any other tool available to you? for the life of me i can't understand why a tech needs to make an outbound call for other than a one line modem call. that my friend comes from being a tech AND moving into the CCO department. reps need to be in their seats taking the calls, utilizing the tools available to them. solve the issue, even if it's simply, hey this is a known issue and dell is aware but has no solution as of yet. don't you think that being honest would be best rather than jerk the customer around by saying you'll research it only to come up with the same problem and STILL NO SOLUTION to it? from call center ops view, calls are backing up because of people with your attitude of doing research. you deal with each caller, then you hit auto-in for the next one. again, other than a one line modem call, from an ops view, there is no other reason for an outbound call being made by an inbound tech, or chimp in your case. sorry dude. been there, done it.
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former dell scapegoat

[biff's buddy]

[poormanq45]