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13thProductions one bitch wonder
Joined: 06 Oct 2005 Posts: 4
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Posted: Thu Oct 06, 2005 4:15 pm Post subject: Correlary to Dell Contract of Sale |
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Herein_so_far_as...
1) if we ("Dell Inc.") determine that you ("yeah you, sucker") have complained about your purchase not being what was contracted for.
2) if we determine that you are correct.
3) we shall try to "upsell" you on a more expensive system than we misdelivered.
4) if you refuse our effort at upselling, and if you are covered by a fully paid full parts and labor warranty for said misdelivered system, we shall refuse to deliver the system originally contracted.
5) if you ask why we have made this decision, we shall connect you to a customer service rep who is guaranteed not to speak English and who most probably works for less than USD $0.08 per day in their country.
6) if you are STILL on the phone with us at this point six hours later, we shall switch you over to an English-speaking customer service rep who will advise you there's nothing wrong with the system we misdelivered.
7) if you are successful at convincing this rep that there is lots wrong with the system - specifically, it has nothing to do with what you purchased - you will be transfererred to a senior customer service rep in the USA. Hold time: approx 14 hours.
if you are STILL on the phone with us at this point fourteen hours later, you have almost won - but not quite. Our senior customer service rep has determined that your system is suffering from a viral infection - and even if it isn't - you must buy from us Sunguard anti-virus software plus another two year warranty for security-related problems for the low package price of another $400.00 before we can consider shipping you the system you originally bought. May we please have the credit card you'd like to put this new purchase on?
=loop back to step one= _________________ It's just a machine! :-> |
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socal dell hater Regular Hater
Joined: 20 Dec 2005 Posts: 10
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Posted: Tue Dec 20, 2005 10:02 pm Post subject: You nailed it ! |
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After my last bad experience with Dell, I am now a former customer forever. I wish I had found this site and read your Commandments before purchasing a Dell desktop recently. I violated numbers 1, 2, 3, 6, 8 and 9 before happily complying with #10. I am now permanently a Dell hater and honestly will never do business with this seriously screwed up company again. I even considered posting my own site boycotting their products, services and company in general. After 2-1/2 months of calls to Tech Svcs, Customer "Care", DFS and Warranty, I've finally gotten to the end of my tolerance for the situation so I'll just pay them what they think I owe them to extract myself from ever having to deal with them again. 200 bucks for my new "Free From Dell" life is worth it to me. Its just a complete injustice when they get my money, and I got nothing from them but a faulty product, the worst customer "service" ever and nothing but the run-around for months. If they were remotely efficient, they'd cut their work force by thousands because they wouldn't need so many people around to pretend they are cleaning up the messes left by daily operations. _________________ Dude, Ya Gotta Get Away from Dell |
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Cepelin conscientious beginner
Joined: 22 Feb 2006 Posts: 1
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