Are you able to use the AC adaptor and turn the damn thing on? Is it just the battery that will not charge? If you answered no to the first question, then:
Motherboard is fried. Pray you have a valid warranty. Call Dell. Suffer. Get replacement motherboard. Install.
Otherwise try to flash the BIOS with latest update from Dell website. Still not working? Make sure you don't have one of those nifty Sony battery packs. Still not working?
Motherboard is fried. Pray you have a valid warranty. Call Dell. Suffer. Get replacement motherboard. Install. _________________ Don't be lazy, build your own computer...
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